Subject: Exaggerations (Page 5)

He is so dumb, blondes tell jokes about him.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

He is so fat… when he steps on a scale, it reads "one at a time, please."

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

He is so stupid… it takes him 2 hours to watch 60 minutes.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

He is so fat… his driver's license says, “picture continued on other side.”

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

It is so hot… the cows arre giving evaporated milk.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

She’s so ugly… when she entered an ugly contest the judges said, "No professionals."

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

The mosquitoes in Louisiana are so big, they can stand flat foot and screw a chicken!

Animals Exaggerations

He is so old… he owes Jesus a quarter.

Age Exaggerations Old

He is so ugly… the psychiatrist makes him lie face down.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

He is so ugly… when he walks into the bank they turn off the cameras.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

He is so stupid… mind readers charge him half price.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

It was so cold… we didn't clean the house – we just defrosted it.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

It was so cold… the kids at school were using flannel notebooks.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

He is so fat… I had to take a train and two buses just to get on his good side.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

She is so fat… when she takes a shower her feet don't get wet.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

She is so stupid… when you said it was chilly outside she went and got a bowl.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

He is so fat… his high school graduation picture was an aerial photograph.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

His ears are so big… he heard the sun come up.

Appearance Body Exaggerations

It was so cold… we had lunch at the "Greasy Spoon" – just for the heartburn.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

It is so hot… chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

She is so ugly… when she goes swimming the tide goes out.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly