Subject: Exaggerations (Page 5)

She is so old… she's in God's year book.

Age Exaggerations Old

She's so fat… when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

His nose is so big… he could smoke a cigar in the shower.

Appearance Body Exaggerations

He is so old… I told him to act his own age, and he died.

Age Exaggerations Old

She is so short… you can see her feet on her driver's license picture.

Appearance Body Exaggerations

She is so ugly… when she gets up, the sun goes down.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

So dry the catfish are carrying canteens.

Exaggerations Science/Weather

It is so hot… I saw a chicken lay a fried egg.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

He is so stupid… mind readers charge him half price.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

He is so fat… when he gets his shoes shined he has to take the man's word for it.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

She is so stupid… she stared at an orange juice carton for twenty minutes because the label said "concentrate."

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

It was so cold… I chipped a tooth on my soup.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

He is so fat… he had his own area code.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

She is so fat… her favorite meal is seconds.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

It was so cold… polar bears were buying fur coats.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

She is so stupid… she can’t make ice without a recipe.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child; she must be found and stopped.

(1911 – 1980) humorist, writer, television host & journalist
Children Exaggerations People Women

It was so cold… the politicians had their hands in their own pockets.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

It is so hot… the cows arre giving evaporated milk.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

It is so hot… chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

It is so hot… I saw a squirrel fanning his nuts.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather