Subject: Family » Children (Page 12)

Even though your kids will consistently do the exact opposite of what you’re telling them to do, you have to keep loving them just as much.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Children Emotions Family Love

Ironic how you can’t get kids out of their beds in the morning but you can’t get them into their beds at night.

(1958 – ) Australian author
Children Family Situations Sleep

I wasn’t really that informed about the two-year-old; oh, I’d read about them, and occasionally I’d see documentaries on the Discovery Channel showing two-year-olds in the wild, where they belong.

(1957 – ) American stand-up comedian, actor & screenwriter
Children Family

This is my second marriage, and I have a kid from my first marriage 'cause I like souvenirs.

(1963 – ) American comedian
Children Marriage

Many children threaten at times to run away from home — this is the only thing that keeps many parents going.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Children Family Parents

Children should neither be seen nor heard from… ever again.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Children Time

Children and [zippers] do not respond to force… except occasionally.

(1928 – ) British journalist, writer & columnist
Children Family Things

I am fond of children (except boys).

(1832 – 1898) English author, mathematician, logician & photographer
Children Family

Cycling's a good thing for the youngsters, because it keeps them off the streets.

Children Sports

Father’s Feedback: The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.

Children Definitions Family Food/Drink

Now the thing about having a baby – and I can’t be the first person to have noticed this – is that thereafter you have it.

(1922 – 2003) author & playwright
Children Family

Having kids is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.

(1943 – ) comedian & actor
Children Family

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford… then I want to move in with them.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Children Family Situations Things

Time moves slower in a fast moving vehicle.

Children Murphy’s Laws Time

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Children Family

We have a beautiful little girl who we named after my mom; in fact Passive Aggressive Psycho turns five tomorrow.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Children Family Mothers Old

After you have children, the economic law reverses to Demand and Supply.

writer
Children Family

Children are smarter than any of us; cause I don't know one child with a full time job and children.

(1961 – 1994) comedian
Children Family Intelligence

Never underestimate a child’s ability to get into more trouble.

(1943 – ) comedian & actor
Children Family

Homosexuality is God’s way of ensuring that the truly gifted aren’t burdened with children.

comedian, composer & lyricist
Characteristics Children Intelligence People

If you’ve never been hated by your child, you’ve never been a parent.

(1908 – 1989) American actress of film, television & theater
Children Emotions Family Parents