Subject: Family (Page 3)

You know how growing up we all had that voice inside our head that tells us we’re not good enough? Well, mine was outside my head driving me to school.

(1970 – ) American actress
Family Mothers People Self TV/Movie Quotes

I was born when my dad was 50; it’s weird growing up with a dad that much older than you… we’d go to the movies, we’re both getting discounts.

(1970 –) American stand-up comedian
Age Family Fathers Old Young

When I was ten, my family moved to Downers Grove Illinois; when I was twelve, I found them.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Family Self Situations

All the men in my family are bald, and all the women are hunchbacked – and they don’t know we’re bald.

comedian
Appearance Body Family Fathers

And even though I’m proud my father invented the rear view mirror, we’re not as close as we appear.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Family Fathers

The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable Christian forbearance among men.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Children Family

The number of person's relatives is directly proportional to his fame.

Family Murphy’s Laws Relationships

I love all my children… I’m delighted to see them come and delighted to see them go.

(1912 – 2002) English novelist
Children Family

There is no more somber enemy of good art than the pram in the hall.

(1903 – 1974) English intellectual, literary critic & writer
Art Children Entertainment Family

I can be President of the United States, or I can control Alice [his daughter], I cannot possibly do both.

(1858 – 1919) 26th U.S. president
Children Family

You know, it was only after my father showed me what I would inherit that I struggled to keep him alive.

(1967 – ) English comedian
Family Fathers

What ya eat ain't got nuttin' to do with how old ya are. That all depends on your ancestors. It's what they call a matter of heresy.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Family Malaprops

To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Family Relationships

I don’t visit my parents often because Delta Airlines won’t wait in the yard while I run in.

stand-up comedian, actor, writer & producer
Family Mothers

I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.

(1884 – 1972) 33rd U.S. president
Beliefs Children

When traveling with children… at least one child of any number of children will request a rest room stop exactly halfway between any two given rest areas.

Activities Children Family Murphy’s Laws Travel

Never underestimate a child’s ability to get into more trouble.

(1943 – ) comedian & actor
Children Family

Baby: Nine months interest on a small deposit.

Children Definitions Family

There never was a child so lovely, but his mother was glad to get him asleep.

(1803 – 1882) essayist, poet, & philosopher
Age Children Family Situations Sleep

About all some men accomplish in life is to send a son to Harvard.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Children People

I am fond of children (except boys).

(1832 – 1898) English author, mathematician, logician & photographer
Children Family