Subject: Food/Drink » Alcohol (Page 2)

Alcohol is ok in modification.

Little Bobby’s Drunk Again

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol… it was the worst 20 minutes of my life.

(1946 – 2005) Irish professional football player

It’s useless to hold a person to anything he says while he’s in love, drunk, or running for office.

(1934 – ) American actress, dancer, activist & author

Hangover: The moaning after the night before.

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist

I spilled some vodka on the carpet, and I vacuumed it up, and the vacuum got drunk. I had to take the Hoover to detox.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian

Secretary: Someday you'll drown in a vat of whiskey.

Field’s reply as an aside: Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting?

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

My uncle was the town drunk… and we lived in Chicago.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor

Harry Payne Bosterly: You’re drunk!

Harold: And you’re crazy. But I’ll be sober tomorrow and you’ll be crazy for the rest of your life.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising… it was the only exercise I got.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

We have a drinking game in Australia, it’s called drinking.

(1977 – ) Australian comedian

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.

(1953 – ) American singer, songwriter, actor, author & radio personality

Thou shalt not covet they neighbors’s house… unless they have a well-stocked bar.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer

Wine we need for health, and the health we need to drink vodka.

(1938 – 2010) Russian politician

The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass.

(1943 – ) comedian & actor

I drink to make other people seem more interesting.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor

I thought AAA was an organization for people who are really bad alcoholics.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer

Yeah… I remember my first beer.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician