Subject: Food/Drink (Page 14)

A sandwich is an attempt to make both ends meat.

Food/Drink

I think that I would be a good father… especially if my baby liked to go out drinking.

(1974 – ) Russian-born American comedian, writer & filmmaker
Alcohol Children Family Fathers

Coach: Beer, Normie?

Norm: Coach: I don’t know. I’ll have one next week… what the heck, I’m young.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.

Food/Drink

No animal ever invented anything so bad as drunkenness – or so good as drink.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Alcohol Food/Drink

It all starts innocently, mixing chocolate and Rice Krispies, but before you know it you’re adding raisins and marshmallows – it’s a rocky road.


Food/Drink

Business Lunch: Lunch.

Definitions Food/Drink

Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child – if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Children Food/Drink Time

I don't care where I sit, as long as I get fed.

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
Eating Food/Drink

I try to keep fit; I’ve got these parallel bars at home… I run at them and try to buy a drink from both of them.

(1954 – ) English comedian writer
Activities Alcohol Exercise Food/Drink

Cookin’ With Coolio

Book Titles Cooking Food/Drink

The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Alcohol Communication People

Never drink anything that’s still on fire.

Alcohol Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

You can travel fifty thousand miles in America without once tasting a piece of good bread.

(1891 – 1980) novelist & painter
Activities America Food/Drink Places Travel

Burt Johnson: I don't drink because drinking affects your decision-making.

Arthur: You may be right… I can't decide.

(1935 – 2002) English actor, comedian, composer & musician
Alcohol Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

I only drink to steady my nerves… sometimes I’m so steady I don’t move for months.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink

1. Everything is cold except what should be. 2. Everything, including the corn flakes, is greasy.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

Someone asked me recently – what would I rather give up, food or sex; neither! … I'm not falling for that one again, Wife!

(1980 – ) English comedian & novelist
Food/Drink Marriage Sex

The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off; I shot the happiest 83 of my life.

(1935 – ) Puerto Rican professional golfer
Alcohol Golf Sports

Whenever I want a really nice meal, I start dating again.

comedian
Dating Eating Food/Drink Relationships

No matter how many beautifully crafted, near-to-perfection baked goods you crank out on a regular basis, the moment one such item becomes required in some official capacity, it will flop.

Cooking Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws