Subject: Food/Drink (Page 21)

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Emotions Food/Drink Laughter

I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.

(1917 – 1995) singer, actor & comedian
Alcohol Food/Drink People

Beer with no alcohol — what a waste; that is like a nun with a D-cup.

(1958 – ) American actress & stand-up comedian
Alcohol Beer Food/Drink

Even today, well-brought-up English girls are taught by their mothers to boil all veggies for at least a month and a half, just in case one of the dinner guests turns up without his teeth.

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
England Food/Drink Places

You are always complimented on the item that took the least effort to prepare. Example: If you make roast turkey, you will be complimented on the baked potato.

Cooking Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

Jesse Ventura is basically proof that the people of Minnesota are not social drinkers… they are obviously alcoholics.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Food/Drink Places Politicians

When I visit China I like to get Chinese food… ff course, over there they just call it food.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Food/Drink Places

Zucchini: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it.

Definitions Food/Drink

Burt Johnson: I don't drink because drinking affects your decision-making.

Arthur: You may be right… I can't decide.

(1935 – 2002) English actor, comedian, composer & musician
Alcohol Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

Marge, I’m going to miss you so much; and it’s not just the sex; it’s also the food preparation.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

A cannibal is a guy who goes into a restaurant and orders the waiter.

(1894 – 1974) comedian, radio & television host
Food/Drink

Gluttony: A sign something is eating us.

Definitions Eating Food/Drink

Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors and miss.

(1907 – 1988) science fiction author
Alcohol Food/Drink Government Taxes

A lot of people don't know it, but onions make me sad!

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Emotions Food/Drink

Science is seeking a cure for thirst and I happen to be the guinea pig.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.

Eating Food/Drink Proverbs Situations Sleep

Get a man a beer, he drinks for five minutes – show him where they are, he drinks all day.

(1959 – ) Australian actor
Alcohol Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

Diet: Something to take the starch out of you.

Definitions Eating Food/Drink

The food on the plane was fit for a king… “Here, King!”

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Food/Drink

Hangover: The wrath of grapes.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Alcohol Food/Drink

More people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Beliefs Intelligence Religion