Subject: Food/Drink (Page 3)

Somebody's been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink

I am not so think as you drunk I am.

(1884 – 1958) British poet, writer, historian & literary editor
Alcohol Food/Drink Wordplay

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Eating Food/Drink

I would have become a Hare Krishna but I didn’t want to become a vegetarian… and that is honestly the reason why – because I’m Italian, I love meatballs!

(1969 – ) U.S. Representative (Delaware)
Food/Drink Misspokements

Dinah [Shore] formed a foundation to locate missing senior citizens by putting their pictures on prune juice bottles.

(1919 – 2006) American comedian & actor
Age Food/Drink Old People

My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses… drinks right out of the bottle.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Age Food/Drink Old

Rebecca: You guys, I have my new wedding dress. And now all I need is something old, something borrowed, and something blue.

Carla: How ‘bout Norm’s liver?

(1948 – ) American actress
Alcohol TV/Movie Quotes

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Cooking Eating Food/Drink Mothers Relationships

At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass; the refill contained the antidote.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Food/Drink

The best audience is intelligent, well-educated, and a little drunk.

(1877 – 1956) U.S. vice president & politician
Alcohol People Situations

Diet: Something to take the starch out of you.

Definitions Eating Food/Drink

The food in such places is so tasteless because the members associate spices and garlic with just the sort of people they're trying to keep out.

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
Food/Drink People

Marge, I’m going to miss you so much; and it’s not just the sex; it’s also the food preparation.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

Much work, much food; little work, little food; no work, burial at sea.

Food/Drink Life Murphy’s Laws Work

I’m at the age where food has taken over the role of sex in my life. In fact last night, I put a mirror over my kitchen table.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Food/Drink Self Sex

Mr. Pibb is a poor imitation of Dr. Pepper. Dude didn’t even get his degree.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink

The French drink to get loosened up for an event, to celebrate and event, and even to recover from an event.

French commission of alcoholism
Alcohol Food/Drink People Places

I always wondered why babies spend so much time sucking their thumbs; then I tasted baby food.

(1927 – ) magician & comedy writer
Food/Drink

Men are simple things; they can survive a whole weekend with only three things: beer, boxer shorts and batteries for the remote control.

Diana Jordan American humorist & author
Beer Men People

Is it impossible to get a cup of coffee-flavored coffee in this country any more?

(1957 – ) American actor, comedian, writer & director
Food/Drink

Nowadays, an after-dinner mint is what you need to pay the restaurant check.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Food/Drink Money