Subject: Food/Drink (Page 33)

Steak and sex, my favorite pair. I get them both very rare.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Food/Drink Sex

They say Flintstone's vitamins are chewable; all vitamins are chewable, it's just that they taste shitty.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Characteristics Food/Drink

I had a chicken finger that was so big, it was a chicken hand.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink

Do not taste food while you’re cooking… you may lose your nerve to eat it.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Cooking Eating Food/Drink

I asked for a dry martini!

(1914 – 2008) screenwriter
Food/Drink

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Body Food/Drink

Leftovers: Repast history.

Definitions Food/Drink

How’s life treating you?

It’s not, Sammy, but you can.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.

Alcohol Beer Murphy’s Laws

I like Kit-Kats unless I’m with four or more people.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink People

A cookie without sugar is a cracker.

(1970 –) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink

All men hear is blah, blah, blah, blah, SEX, blah, blah, blah, FOOD, blah, blah, blah, BEER.

(1957 – ) American actor, comedian, writer & director
Alcohol Beer Communication Men Sex Speech

Nowadays, an after-dinner mint is what you need to pay the restaurant check.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Food/Drink Money

You cannot trust people who have such bad cuisine; it is the country with the worst food after Finland.

(1932 – ) French statesman & president
England Food/Drink Places

Before I met her, I drank and swore without reason… now I have a reason.

(1924 – 1992) English comedian & actor
Alcohol Situations

Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Animals Children Eating People

She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say "when."

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Alcohol Appearance Insults

Woody: How’s it going Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Poor.
Woody: I’m sorry to hear that.
Norm: No, I mean pour.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

I saw a notice that said "Drink Canada Dry" and I've just started.

(1923 – 1964) Irish poet, short story writer, novelist & playwright
Alcohol Food/Drink

What’s a sesame seed grow into? … I don’t know we never give them a chance… what the f**k is a sesame?! … it’s a street… it’s a way to open shit…

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink

Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people “the cops.”

(1965 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Alcohol Autos Driving Food/Drink Things