Subject: Food/Drink (Page 4)

Alcohol is ok in modification.

Alcohol Food/Drink Malaprops

I’ve decided to make Grammy Moon’s famous sheep’s head stew. Don’t worry, the name’s a bit misleading – it’s actually more of a soup.

(1961 – ) English actress, model, producer, comedian, singer & dancer
Cooking Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

If you stop eating donuts you will live three years longer; it’s just three more years that you want a donut.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Death Food/Drink Life

Chickens: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

Animals Definitions Eating Food/Drink

Candy corn is the only candy in the history of America that's never been advertised; and there's a reason – all of the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Food/Drink Past Time

You gotta be a special kind of hungry to put something in your mouth that you get from a stranger on the streets of Manhattan, especially in Times Square, if you know what I mean.

(1960 – ) American comedian
Food/Drink Places

A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts.

Alcohol Ideas Murphy’s Laws

I tried cocaine to lose weight… it just made me eat faster.

(1953 – ) American comedian & actor
Activities Appearance Body Drugs Eating Fat

Everybody wants to peel his own banana.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

Horse ovaries

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Food/Drink Malaprops

In a family recipe that you discovered in an old book, the most vital measurement will be illegible.

Cooking Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed.

(1904 – 1963) American journalist
America England Food/Drink Places

My wife’s such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Cooking Food/Drink

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws Wordplay

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Food/Drink Past Things Time

I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.

(1917 – 1995) singer, actor & comedian
Alcohol Food/Drink People

I went to a Chinese-German restaurant; the food is great, but an hour later you're hungry for power.

(1936 – ) television talk show host
Food/Drink

We drink to one another’s health, and spoil our own.

(1859 – 1927) English writer
Food/Drink Health

I got so drunk one night I woke up in a chalk outline.

American comedian
Alcohol Food/Drink

Never buy a drink for the road, because the road is already laid out.

(1933 – 1998) comedian & actor
Alcohol Food/Drink

They say hot dogs can kill you; how do you know it’s not the bun?

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Food/Drink