Subject: Food/Drink (Page 43)

Whaddya say, Norm?

Well, I never met a beer I didn’t drink.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

Can I draw you a beer, Norm?

No, I know what they look like; just pour me one.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

Alcohol is a good preservative for everything but brains.

author
Alcohol Food/Drink Science/Weather

My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses… drinks right out of the bottle.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Age Food/Drink Old

The hardness of the butter is in direct proportion to the softness of the bread.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.

(1918 – 2002) Irish comedian, writer, musician, poet & playwright
Food/Drink Places

Time to cleanse my palette – I’m gonna get a beer.

(1940 – 2018) English-American actor & comedian
Beer Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

Secretary: Someday you'll drown in a vat of whiskey.

Field’s reply as an aside: Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting?

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Death Food/Drink

Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Animals Children Eating People

Beer… so much more than just a breakfast drink.

Beer Food/Drink

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare.

(1949 – ) American actor & environmentalist
Food/Drink Health Insults Places

He dreamed he was eating shredded wheat and woke up to find the mattress half gone.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Food/Drink Situations Sleep

[To Norm, coming in from the rain] Still pouring, Norm?

That’s funny, I was about to ask you the same thing.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

I feel like I am too old to eat jelly, but I am too young to eat prunes… I am between grapes.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian, television writer/producer & radio host
Food/Drink

Never order a drink where you get to keep the glass.

novelist, screenwriter & businessman
Food/Drink Situations

My wife has to be the worst cook; her specialty is indigestion.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Cooking Food/Drink Health Wives

Beer math is 2 beers times 37 men equals 49 cases.

Beer Science/Weather

“Sir, the cereal is bland and unfulfilling, what should we name it?” … ”Life.”

American comedian
Food/Drink

In Pizza Express you can get garlic bread with cheese and tomato; now correct me if I’m wrong, but that’s pizza.

(1972 – ) Anglo-Irish comedian, writer & actor
Food/Drink

A tavern is a place where madness is sold by the bottle.  

(1667 – 1745) Irish satirist & essayist
Alcohol Food/Drink

When I was pregnant, my friends sneered: ‘Eating for two, are we?’… I said, get lost, I’m not cutting down.

(1957 – ) British stand-up comedian
Appearance Body Eating Food/Drink