Subject: Government » Law

When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

(1927 – ) American comedian
Government Law

Nothing is illegal if one hundred well-placed business men decide to do it.

(1932 – ) American politician, diplomat, activist & pastor
Government Law

Judge: A law student who grades his own papers.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Definitions Law

When the [Supreme] Court moved to Washington in 1800, it was provided with no books, which probably accounts for the high quality of early opinions.

(1892 – 1954) U.S. Attorney General & Supreme Court justice
Government Law

If you have the facts on your side, hammer the facts. If you have the law on your side, hammer the law. If you have neither the facts nor the law, hammer the table.

Facts Government Law Murphy’s Laws

Jury: Twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

(1874 – 1963) American poet
Definitions Government Law Lawyers

90% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

Government Law Lawyers

Court Of Law: A place where a suit is pressed and a man maybe taken to the cleaners.

Definitions Law

These people have served a longer sentence than some people who have committed murder.

(1943 – ) American television journalist & author
Government Law Situations

A liberal is a conservative who has been arrested.

(1931 – ) American author & journalist
Beliefs Conflict Law People

My retirement plan is a slippery floor at a department store.

American comedian
Law Money

Jury: A body of twelve men selected to decide which of the contestants has the better lawyer.

Definitions Government Law Lawyers

The one great principle of the English law is, to make business for itself.

(1812 – 1870) English novelist
England Government Law Places

Laws are like cobwebs, which may catch small flies, but let wasps and hornets break through.

(1667 – 1745) Irish satirist & essayist
Government Law

I’m the mayor, I can do whatever I want until the courts tell me I can’t.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Government Law

We still… cannot catch Osama bin Laden, but we nailed Martha Stewart's ass to the wall.

(1964 – ) American comedian & actor
Failure Government Law People

Lawyers, I suppose, were children once.

(1775 – 1834) English critic & essayist
Age Children Government Law Lawyers Young

I would think the squad car cop is to the cop on a bike as the sketch artist is to the etch-a-sketch artist.

(1969 – ) American stand-up comedian
Government Law

I don’t want to know what the law is, I want to know who the judge is.

(1927 – 1986) American attorney
Government Law

Those that respect the law and love sausage should watch neither being made.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Congress Food/Drink Government Law

However harmless a thing is, if the law forbids it most people will think it wrong.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
Government Law