Subject: Government » Law (Page 3)

We shouldn’t have to be burdened with all the technicalities that come up from time to time with shrewd, smart lawyers interpreting what the laws or what the Constitution may or may not say.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Government Law Lawyers Misspokements

Isn't it great to live in a society where the penalty for lying to a congressman can be up to 30 years in jail, but the penalty for a congressman lying to you is another two years in office.

(1955 – ) American sportswriter
Beliefs Congress Golf Government Honesty Law Lies

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Government Language Law

If you haven’t seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven’t seen her smile her prettiest.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Government Law Marriage Wives

Criminal lawyer is a redundancy.

Government Law Lawyers

It is impossible to tell where the law stops and justice begins.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Government Law

However harmless a thing is, if the law forbids it most people will think it wrong.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
Government Law

I went to medical school here at Columbia; I got my M.D.; and was practicing out in Colorado, where I decided to quit and do stand-up – and not just because of the lawsuits.

(1971 – ) American comedian, actor, television host & former physician
Doctors Education Health Law School

The best way to get a bad law repealed is to enforce it strictly.

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president
Government Law

Why do they call it a “hate” crime, if I like doing it?

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Government Law

Nothing is illegal if one hundred well-placed business men decide to do it.

(1932 – ) American politician, diplomat, activist & pastor
Government Law

Justice is open to everyone in the same way as the Ritz Hotel.

(1740 – 1819) American lawyer, jurist & politician
Government Law

Liquor – you can make it illegal but you can't make it unpopular.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
Alcohol Food/Drink Law

In Scotland we have a verdict ‘not proven;’ that means ‘not guilty, but don’t do it again.’

Law Places

A lawyer is a learned gentleman who rescues your estate from your enemies and keeps it himself.

(1778 – 1868) English politician
Government Law Lawyers

As one gets older, litigation replaces sex.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Law Sex

There is more law in the end of a policeman’s nightstick than in a decision of the Supreme Court.

Government Law Murphy’s Laws

It’s better to be tried by twelve men than to be carried by six.

Conflict Crime Death Government Law Murphy’s Laws

Easiest job you could ever have… whoever gets to put Michael Jackson in a witness chair and create "reasonable doubt."

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
Law Situations

Only one thing, is impossible for God; to find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Government Law

You might be a redneck if… ya can't get married to yer sweetheart 'cause there is a law against it.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Government Law Marriage People Rednecks