Subject: Government » Law (Page 4)

Censorship does not interfere with the constitutional rights of every American to sit alone in a dark room in the nude and cuss.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
Government Law People

Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Government Law Lawyers

Laws are like cobwebs, which may catch small flies, but let wasps and hornets break through.

(1667 – 1745) Irish satirist & essayist
Government Law

There is more law in the end of a policeman’s nightstick than in a decision of the Supreme Court.

Government Law Murphy’s Laws

For certain people, after fifty, litigation takes the place of sex.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Age Law Old Sex

Master of the Rolls: Really, Mr Smith, do give this Court credit for some little intelligence.

Smith: That is the mistake I made in the Court below, My Lord.

(1872 – 1930) British statesman, politician & lawyer
Government Law

Your honor, may I encroach the bench?

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Law Malaprops

Why should we tell kidnappers, murderers, and embezzlers their rights? … if they don’t know their rights, they shouldn’t be in the business.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
Government Law

A jury is a group of twelve people of average ignorance.

(1820 – 1903) English philosopher
Government Intelligence Law People

Contract: An agreement that is binding only on the weaker party.

(1822 – 1891) U.S. senator (South Carolina)
Government Law

When the President does it, that means that it is not illegal.

(1913 – 1994) 37th U.S. president
Government Law President

Justice is open to everyone in the same way as the Ritz Hotel.

(1740 – 1819) American lawyer, jurist & politician
Government Law

I would much prefer to be a judge than a coal miner because of the absence of falling coal.

(1937 – 1995) English satirist, writer & comedian
Government Law

Judge: A law student who grades his own papers.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Definitions Law

I don’t want to know what the law is, I want to know who the judge is.

(1927 – 1986) American attorney
Government Law

I’m the mayor, I can do whatever I want until the courts tell me I can’t.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Government Law

Jury: A body of twelve men selected to decide which of the contestants has the better lawyer.

Definitions Government Law Lawyers

You have the right to remain silent; anything you say will be misquoted then used against you.

Communication Law Speech

I feel proud to be living in a country where people are not afraid to laugh at themselves and where political satire is tolerated by the government, if not the television network.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
Government Law Politics

Lawyers, I suppose, were children once.

(1775 – 1834) English critic & essayist
Age Children Government Law Lawyers Young

Every girl dreams, when they grow up, they’re gonna marry a doctor, marry a lawyer; but me, I had to marry the only lawyer in America with a conscience.

(1963 – ) American comedian
Government Husbands Law Lawyers Marriage