Subject: Government (Page 22)

Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest.

(1713 – 1784) French philosopher, art critic & writer
Government

Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are.

Military Murphy’s Laws

The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.

Arms Intelligence Military

America is a land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
America Places Taxes

How come there's only one Monopolies Commission?

(1944 – ) English writer & broadcaster
Government

The government deficit is the difference between the amount of money the government spends and the amount it has the nerve to collect.

(1920 – 2001) American writer & humorist
Government Money

Honest Politician: One who, when he is bought, will stay bought.

Definitions Government Politicians

Remember the politician who wouldn't release his tax returns and it turned out he had nothing to hide? … Me neither.

(1958 – ) American writer, comedian, satirist & actor
Government Politicians Taxes

A bureaucrat is a Democrat who holds some office that a Republican wants.

(1877 – 1956) U.S. vice president & politician
Government Politicians

Being in the army is like being in the Boy Scouts, except the Boy Scouts have adult supervision.

(1946 – ) American actor, voice actor & comedian
Government Military

We are not retreating, we are advancing in another direction.

Military Murphy’s Laws

Lawyer: A fellow who is willing to go out and spend your last cent to prove he’s right.

Definitions Lawyers

Have you ever seen a candidate talking to a rich person on television?

(1925 – 2007) humorist & columnist
Government Politicians

I've arranged with my executor to be buried in Chicago, because when I die, I want to still remain active politically.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Death Places Politics

I will feel equality has arrived when we can elect to office women who are as incompetent as some of the men who are already there.

daughter of President Ronald Reagan & Jane Wyman
Elections/Voting Government

A man with both feet planted firmly in the air.

(1882 – 1945) 32nd U.S. president
Definitions People Politics

Whenever you lose contact with the enemy, look behind you.

Military Murphy’s Laws

A lawyer is someone who writes a 40-page document and calls it a brief!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Government Law Lawyers

Lawyer: One skilled in circumvention of the law.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Law

The climate of England has been the world’s most powerful colonizing impulse.

England Government Places Science/Weather

What’s needed in government is more horse sense and less nonsense.

Government