Subject: Government (Page 46)

The difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Congress Government

I had the right to remain silent, but I had lost the ability to.

(1956 – ) American stand-up comedian
Alcohol Food/Drink Law

Votes are like trees, if you are trying to build a forest; if you have more trees than you have forests, then at that point the pollsters will probably say you will win.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Government Misspokements

Democracy: A state of mind in which every man is as good as every other man, provided he really is.

Definitions Democracy Government

A conservative is someone who believes in reform… but not now.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Beliefs Government Politics

We don’t just have egg on our face; we have omelette all over our suits.

(1940 – ) American television journalist & author
Elections/Voting Government

The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Intelligence Taxes Understanding World

In legislative bodies, it is customary to mention all members as honorable; as, “the honorable gentleman is a scurvy cur.”

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Government

I’ve still got a lot to learn about Washington… Thursday, I accidentally spent some of my own money.

U.S. Senator (1942 – 2015) U.S. senator (Tennessee) & actor
Government Places

I always wanted to get into politics, but I was never light enough to make the team.

(1925 – 2007) humorist & columnist
Fat Government Politics

I rather entrust the government of the United States to the first 400 people listed in the Boston telephone directory than to the faculty of Harvard University.

(1925 – 2008) American conservative author, commentator & television host
Government

Don’t look conspicuous – in the combat, it draws fire; out of the combat zone, it draws sergeants.

Military Murphy’s Laws

Never murder a man who is committing suicide.

Government Murphy’s Laws Politics Situations

Government intervention in the free market always leads to a lower national standard of living.

Government Murphy’s Laws

People try to live within their income so they can afford to pay taxes to a government that can't live within its income.

businessman
Government Money Taxes

A bunch of bong-smoking, America-bashing, flag-burning, yoga-posing, incense-burning, dolphin-saving, salmon-eating hypocrites; these are the sensitive, liberal people who are always yelling about people's freedom of speech and expression, unless you happen to say something that pisses them off.

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
Beliefs Government People Politics

Karen, I am a lawyer, which means, unlike you, I actually passed a bar.

(1963 – ) Canadian-American actor
Lawyers TV/Movie Quotes

The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small.

Clothing Government Military Murphy’s Laws

What’s needed in government is more horse sense and less nonsense.

Government

Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation.

(1923 – ) German-born diplomat & scholar
Politicians

The price of any product produced for a government agency will be not less than the square of the initial Firm Fixed-Price Contract.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws