Subject: Government » Politicians (Page 6)

I won’t eat anything that has intelligent life, but I’d gladly eat a network executive or a politician.

(1934 – 1982) English writer, comedian & actor
Eating Food/Drink Politicians

The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Intelligence Memory Politicians

You have all the characteristics of a popular politician: a horrible voice, bad breeding, and a vulgar manner.

(450 BC – 388 BC) Greek Athenian comic playwright
Characteristics Government Politicians

Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don't understand, such as working for a living.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Government Politicians Work

The news of any politician’s death should be listed under ”Public Improvements.”

(1902 – 1963) Danish actor
Death Government Politicians Situations

There ought to be one day – just one – when there is open season on senators.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Politicians

Elections are when people find out what politicians stand for, and politicians find out what people will fall for.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Elections/Voting Government Politicians

No politician talks taxes during an election year.

Elections/Voting Government Murphy’s Laws Politicians Taxes

What this country needs is more unemployed politicians.

(1928 – 1995) American artist
Government Politicians

People don’t let politicians kiss your babies; those lips have been on lobbyist asses for years now.

(1952 – ) American comedian & actor
Government Politicians

The difference between a politician and a snail is that a snail leaves its slime behind.

Murphy’s Laws Politicians

Despite his infirmities, Strom Thurmond showed up to work every day and did not miss a Senate vote in his final year, though no one is sure if a shouted “Bingo!” counted as a yea or a nay.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Government Politicians

I have never found, in a long experience of politics, that criticism is ever inhibited by ignorance.

(1894 – 1986) British prime minister
Communication Intelligence Politicians

A politician will do anything to keep his job—even become a patriot.

(1863 – 1951) American newspaper magnate & politician
Government Politicians

Politicians are the same all over; they promise to build a bridge even when there’s no river.

(1894 – 1971) Soviet premier
Government Politicians

Foot: A politician’s pacifier.

Definitions Politicians

Politicians who vote huge expenditures to alleviate problems get re-elected; those who propose structural changes to prevent problems get early retirement.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws Politicians

Practical prayer is harder on the soles of your shoes than on the knees of your trousers.

(1858 – 1932) American physicist, physician & humorist
Government Politicians

Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.

Definitions Politicians

Remember… write to your congressman; even if he can’t read… write to him.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Communication Intelligence Politicians Reading/Writing

Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation.

(1923 – ) German-born diplomat & scholar
Politicians