Subject: Government » Taxes (Page 3)

Taxpayer: One who doesn’t have to pass a civil service exam to work for the government.

Definitions Government Taxes Work

The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Congress Death Government Taxes

[Charles Dickens] was the bravest man who ever lived; he fathered ten children before they became tax deductions.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Children Family Money Taxes

I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States; the only thing is – I could be just as proud for half the money.

(1903 – 1983) American radio and television broadcaster & entertainer
America Government Money Places Taxes

The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
America Golf Government People Sports Taxes

The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that carries any reward.

(1883 – 1946) English economist
Government Intelligence Money Taxes

I think that after the third marriage Georgie tried to claim his divorce attorney as a dependent.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Divorce Government Lawyers Marriage Taxes

The nation should have a tax system that looks like someone designed it on purpose.

(1927 – 2000) American businessman & Secretary of Treasury
Government Taxes

If a taxpayer thinks he can cheat safely, he probably will.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws Taxes

The more heavily a man is supposed to be taxed, the more power he has to escape being taxed.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws Taxes

As long as you are a tax deduction, you will always be safe in my house.

(1961 – ) American comedian, actor & talk show host
Government Taxes

Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a big consumer organization that never pays a nickel in taxes.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Government Money Taxes Work

The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.

(1959 – ) American comedian
Characteristics Taxes

The average American now pays out twice as much in taxes as he formerly got in wages.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Government Money Taxes

Employees make the best dates; you don’t have to pick them up and they’re always tax-deductible.

(1928 – 1987) painter, printmaker & filmmaker
Dating Relationships Taxes Work

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

Definitions Science/Weather Taxes

The pay raise is just large enough to increase your taxes and just small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws Taxes

The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Intelligence Taxes Understanding World

When there’s a single thief, it's robbery; when there are a thousand thieves, it’s taxation.

Crime Government Taxes

Government Bureau: Where the taxpayer’s shirt is kept.

Definitions Government Taxes

Income Tax: The entry fee for the rat race.

Definitions Government Taxes