Subject: Headlines (Page 22)

Anna Nicole Smith’s Boobs Explode

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Manhunt For Former Elf Boss

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Women’s Chorus Adds Belcher to Membership

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Mermaid Entertains Popular Hunchback

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Lawmakers Disagree Over Why They Can’t Agree

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Chef Throws His Heart Into Helping Feed Needy

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Murdered Fiancés Present Petition To Number 10

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Milk Drinkers are Turning to Powder

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Brain Dead Hero Pushed Friend Out Of Danger

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For Valentine's Day, Try to Plan Your Spontaneity

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Astronomers Say Comet Should Be Visible To The Naked Idaho

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Small Town Celebrates "Toilet Fest"

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Upset Bank Robber “I know what I did was wrong. I don’t need 10 years to figure that out," thief complains

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Trout Being Tempted By Extra-Terrestrials

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Virgins Are Discovered In Essex

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Man Rams Into Taco Bell Over Missing Taco

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Twinkies Shortage Looms

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Doctor Execution Policy Debated

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Baby Born Holding Mum’s I.U.D.

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Chicken Banned From Crossing The Road

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Dead Youth Had Serious Medical Condition

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