Subject: Headlines (Page 32)

Man Doesn’t Want To Go To Jail Without Underwear

Drug Squad Nabs Flying Carpets

Head of Anti-Violence Group Arrested for Hitting Referee

Terror Leader In Iraq Declares War On Tape

Air Traffic Controllers Can Apply For Job In Braille

Woman Charged With Bringing Contraband Into Penal Facility After Weapon Found Inside Orifice

Psychotic White Rhino Boards Freedom Flight

Troops Set Assault on MILF Camp

Kruger Park Lions Dying Like Flies

Dragons Slay Galaxy

Invisible Man Faked Death In Paddington Rail Crash

Nanny Calm As Troops Close In

Big Black Hole Found In The Sky

Homicide Victims Rarely Talk to Police

Man Denies He Committed Suicide

Bridges Help People Cross Rivers

500 Elves Loose

Stabbing Doesn't Spoil Friendship

Catholic, Pubic Schools’ Fees Differ

Old Guy Found Wandering at Stadium

Strike Over, Twinkie Shortage Ends