Subject: Headlines (Page 39)

Antique Dealer Thought Girl Was Older

Asian Scholars Come More Frequently

Whoopee? Oopsie! Honk If the Dealership Used Your Car for Sex

Minneapolis Will Pay $165,000 to Zombies

Body Of Unarmed Man Slain By Police Leaving For Africa

Man Doesn’t Want To Go To Jail Without Underwear

Officers Shoot Dead Burglar In Siege

Van In Pork Pie Ambush

New Sick Policy Requires 2-day Notice

Police Pay £20,000 For Dead Parrots

Largest Amount Of Cannabis Ever Seized In Joint Operation

Jury Finds Pope Guilty Of Homicide

Jane Fonda to Teens: Use Head to Avoid Pregnancy

Lying Weather Forecast

Wife Gives Birth To Boy; He Asks For Old Age Pension

Federer Excited By His Own Form, Eager to Reclaim Top Spot

Snowman Quits Top Opera Job

Deer Kill 17,328

Chinese Apeman Dated

Why Americans Love to Hate Government

Gore Helps Kids Learn Gibberish