Subject: Headlines (Page 57)

Judges To Learn "Human Awareness"

Police Want Extra Eyes To Catch Impaired Drivers

Harrowing, Hungry Voyage For 22 Aliens

Drive To Ban Horse Whipping Mushrooms

Feds Step Up Laundering Crackdown

Rector With Crowbar Seeks To Lay Nun's Ghost

Yeltsin Promises To Stay In Space

Latin Course To Be Cancelled – No Interest Among Students, Et Al.

Nader Calls Convention a 'Carnival'

Fox Offers Mexicans An End To Monologue

Psychotic White Rhino Boards Freedom Flight

Flying Bishop Pursued

Quintuplets Born 15 Months Early

Sharks Gored In Bullring

Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni

Big Rig Carrying Fruit Crashes on 210 Freeway, Creates Jam

Skydiver Lands on Beer Vendor at Women’s Cole Slaw Wrestling Event

Chef Throws His Heart Into Helping Feed Needy

Unicorn Safe Thanks To Cash

Man Admits Stuffing Shrimp Into Pants

Two Mexican Midget Wrestlers Killed by Fake Prostitutes