Subject: Headlines (Page 73)

Hospitals Resort To Hiring Doctors

Best Man Left Bleeding After Being Hit in Head by Flying Dildo

Quintuplets Born 15 Months Early

Smaller Families Require Less Food

Boy Wants To Mount Autographed Guitar

Cash Boost For Truancy

Would She Climb To The Top Of Mr. Everest Again? Absolutely!

6,000 RIM Jobs on the Line

Nurses Warn Against Rash Use Of Herbal Oil Treatments

Angry Grandma Allegedly Knifed 12-Year-Old’s Ear

Insects Play Important Role In Helping To Solve Crimes

Cops Quiz Victim In Fatal Shooting

Sewer Input Sought

Cattleman Grilled by Oprah's Lawyers

Study Shows Frequent Sex Enhances Pregnancy Chances

Lady Jacks Off to Hot Start in Conference

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Experts Say

Five-Headed Coach to Lead Washington School

Normal Man Marries Oblong Woman

Mass Poisoning In Donkey Soup War

Robber Orders Starbucks Employee To Ground