Subject: Headlines (Page 95)

Four Top Dogs Induced Into Meat Industry Hall Of Fame

Two Cars Were Reported Stolen By The Groveton Police Yesterday

British Union Finds Dwarfs In Short Supply

Fleeing Aliens Denied Entry Into Tanzania

Bug Spawns 100 Year Old Babies

Teachers Strike Idle Kids

Potato, Dancing Raisins Cut a Deal

Complaints About NBA Referees Growing Ugly

Meeting On Open Meetings Is Closed

Crook Joins Barclaycard UK

Coroner In Call To Put A Stop To Drink-All-You-Can-Nights After Death

Detroit News-Free Press

Skywalkers in Korea Cross Han Solo

Why My Brain Hates Your Mistakes

Cops Quiz Victim In Fatal Shooting

Sick Skunks Overrun Massachusetts

Chef Throws His Heart Into Helping Feed Needy

Dead Man Wins His Unfair Sacking Battle

Ski slope injuries "hurt NHS"

Hundreds Hurt During Annual Stone-throwing Festival

Salesman Says He Left 4 Large Rings in Malden Bathtub