Subject: Health » Doctors (Page 6)

You know you’ve reached middle age when you’re cautioned to slow down by your doctor, instead of by the police.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Age Doctors Health

Groinocologist

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Doctors Health Malaprops

She got her good looks from her father, he’s a plastic surgeon.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Appearance Doctors Family Fathers Health

Half a psychiatrist's patients see him because they are married – the other half because they're not.

(1905 –1998) American author
Doctors Health Marriage

Doctors think a lot of patients are cured who have simply quit in disgust.

(1889 – 1966) American humorist, writer, illustrator & cartoonist
Doctors Health

Osteopath: A man who works his fingers to your bones.

Definitions Doctors

Beware of the physician who is great at getting out of trouble.

Doctors Health Murphy’s Laws

Chiropractor: A doctor who works his fingers to the bone… yours.

Definitions Doctors

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems… like your groinocology.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Doctors Health Malaprops

Chiropodist: A man who makes money hand over foot.

Definitions Doctors Occupations

Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows what it is.

Doctors Health Murphy’s Laws

If your time ain’t come, not even a doctor can kill you.

Death Doctors Health Life Proverbs

No physician is really good before he has killed one or two patients.

Doctors Health Proverbs

If your condition seems to be getting better, it's probably your doctor getting sick.

Doctors Health Murphy’s Laws

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Doctors Health

I’m not feeling very well – I need a doctor immediately; ring the nearest golf course.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Doctors Golf Health Sports

Never accept a drink from a urologist.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Alcohol Characteristics Doctors Health

An alcoholic is a person who drinks more than his own physician.

Alcohol Doctors Food/Drink Health

An apple every eight hours keeps three doctors away.

Doctors Health Murphy’s Laws

I used to believe that chiropractors where charlatans, but then I went to one, and now I stand corrected.

Jewish-American stand-up comedian & writer
Doctors Health

Four hundred bucks an hour for being sort of nice to sad people.

(1964 – ) American stand-up comedian, actor & voice actor
Doctors Health Money Occupations