Subject: Health (Page 5)

Doctor: The only man who hasn’t a guaranteed cure for a cold.

Definitions Doctors Health

Doctors told me that if my uncle had lived, he most likely would have been a vegetarian.

Health Malaprops

Beware of the young doctor and the old barber.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Doctors Health People

Vagina?… that sounds like something you call in sick with.

American comedian & television host
Communication Health Language

What am I drinking? … NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Alcohol Food/Drink Health

Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Doctors Health

Erectile Dysfunction Probed with Engineering Tool

Headlines Health

I don’t think my wife likes me very much, when I had a heart attack she wrote for an ambulance.

(1926 – 2012) Irish comedian & actor
Health Love Marriage Wives

I know of nothing more laughable than a doctor who does not die of old age.

(1694 – 1778) French author, humanist & satirist
Doctors Emotions Health

Most Doctors Agree Breathing Regularly is Good for You

Doctors Headlines Health

Do you know why they call it 'PMS'? … because 'Mad Cow Disease' was already taken.

Health

Hospitals Resort To Hiring Doctors

Doctors Headlines

This is one of the healthiest X-rays I’ve ever seen… but if we compare that with yours…

(1972 – ) Scottish comedian
Doctors Health

Internship: A sleepless ordeal imposed on young M.D.’s for the purpose of weeding out the weak and infirm among them, and eroding the health of the survivors sufficiently to ensure better empathy in the years to come.

Definitions Doctors

Somebody once said that laughter is the best medicine, and that was clearly written by a man that never tried Vicodin.

(1959 – ) American comedian, comedy writer, actor & author
Activities Drugs Emotions Health Laughter

It’s stressful being a hypochondriac. In my home I have a walk-in medicine chest.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Health

My knees look like they lost a knife fight with a midget.

professional football player
Appearance Body Football Health Sports

The Resistance of Piles to Penetration

Book Titles Health

God heals and the doctor takes the fee.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Beliefs Doctors God Health Money

Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising… it was the only exercise I got.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Activities Alcohol Exercise Food/Drink Health

You’re Sharp Enough To Be Your Own Surgeon

Book Titles Health