Subject: Hollywood Squares (Page 11)

Peter Marshall: You’ve been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?

Don Knotts: That’s what’s been keeping me awake.

(1924 – 2006) American comedic actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall:  Do rosey cheeks always mean good health?

Charley Weaver: Not if you're sitting on a radiator!

Cliff Arquette (1905 – 1974) American actor & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Spiro Agnew was in the infantry during World War Two.  Was he decorated?

Wally Cox: He looked really pretty in the puka shells but they made him take them off…

(1924 – 1973) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: When Henry Kissinger recently visited Japan, he went to a Geisha House, now how did he spent his time in the Geisha House?

Paul Lynde: Oh, negotiating for “peace!”

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Is it possible to drink too much water?

Paul Lynde: Yes, it’s called drowning!

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Is Billy Graham considered a good dresser?

Paul Lynde: No, but he’s a terrific end table.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say “I love you?”

Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

(1911 – 1993) American actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: What do most dentists say you should do with your dentures when you go to bed?

Charlie Weaver: Out at the home, we throw them into the center of the room and have a swap party.

Cliff Arquette (1905 – 1974) American actor & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to the nursery rhyme “Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater had a wife and couldn’t keep her”. Where did he finally put her?

Steve Rossi: I think in a sanitarium.

(1928 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to flag ettiquette, how does a woman show her respect for the American flag? 

George Gobel: She picks up a sailor.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: True or false… most African soccer teams have their own witch doctor.

Redd Foxx: That’s true…and their motto is, “If you can’t beat ‘em, eat ‘em.”

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
Hollywood Squares

John Davidson: What’s the worst thing to have around the house?

Rose Marie: Vacuum cleaners! 

(1923 – ) American actress & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Paul,Zsa Zsa Gabor says she never ever swims with her face in the water. Why?

Paul Lynde: It clogs the drain.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: True or false… Zsa Zsa Gabor is a deputy sheriff in Chicago?

Paul Lynde: It’s a pity that she couldn’t make it in show business.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Paul, Poe’s The Raven said, “Nevermore.” What did Gilbert and Sullivan’s Dickie Bird say?

Paul Lynde: Let’s not wallow in Watergate.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: In a very famous movie who said, “God, what a dump?”

Paul Lynde: Dumbo.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

John Davidson: What did Noah finally do at the age of 952?

Joan Rivers: Paid for his daughter’s wedding.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to Better Homes and Gardens, Is it a good idea to give your yard a light sprinkle?

Michael Landon: … well, if you can’t make it to the house, I mean…

(1936 – 1991) American actor, writer, director & producer
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to animal experts, what usually gets an ostrich to bury its head in the sand?

David Brenner: A falling piano.

(1936 – 2014) American standup comedian, actor & author
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Paul, according to the classic movie Frankenstein, Dr. Frankenstein was supposed to do something important the day the monster killed him. What?

Paul Lynde: A tonsillectomy.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: The Pittsburgh Press calls it a combination of the Jitterbug, the Cha-cha, and the Mambo. What do you call it?

George Gobel: A short in my electric blanket.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares