Subject: Hollywood Squares (Page 9)

Peter Marshall: According to Zsa Zsa, does black look sexy on a woman?

Redd Foxx: I wouldn’t have it any other way.

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Paul, any good sailor knows that when a man falls off a ship you yell ‘Man overboard!’ What should you shout if a woman falls overboard?

Paul Lynde: Full speed ahead!

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to the nursery rhyme, what did Little Bo Peep’s sheep leave behind them?

Paul Lynde: Well, Simple Simon thought they were bread crumbs!

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall:  Do rosey cheeks always mean good health?

Charley Weaver: Not if you're sitting on a radiator!

Cliff Arquette (1905 – 1974) American actor & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Is it possible for a man to get an annulment if he can prove that he was drunk during the wedding ceremony? 

George Gobel: Well, I thought of that, but by the time I sobered up, we had been married 23 years.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: You’re marrying a man who’s been married before. According to the book “Everyday Ettiquette, is it all right to wear a veil?

Paul Lynde: No, I’m just gonna wear a baseball cap.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: You’ve got a secret. According to psychologists, if you’re average, will you probably tell it to a man or to a woman?

Paul Lynde: If I tell it to a man, he might hit me.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to the song classic, “Things aren’t always as bad as they seem if you…” Do what?

Paul Lynde: Put a bag over her head.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to Coronet, do most men feel uneasy around women with really large breasts?

Paul Lynde: Yes, they run for cover.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Tom Bergeron: Since the first woman entered this institution, 84 women have followed her. What institution is that?

Whoopi Goldberg: Marriage to Larry King.

(1955 – ) American comedian, actress, political activist & talk show host
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: The great Sphinx has a human’s head, but whose body?

Rose Marie: Milton Berle's.

(1923 – ) American actress & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to the French Chef, Julia Child, how much is a pinch?

Paul Lynde: Just enough to turn her on.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: According to experts, can you have a one-second dream?

Harvey Korman: Well sure, but I always ask for some of my money back.

(1927 – 2008) American comedic actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: What is the definition of the word “Gobbledygook?”

George Gobel: That’s the stuff that crusts over in turkeys’ eyes when they’re asleep. 

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: If the Six Million Dollar Man and the Bionic Woman were to have a baby, would it be a bionic baby?

George Gobel: Yes, but it would require three doctors, a ground crew and a disposable net.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall:  What makes water hard?

Charley Weaver:  Winter.

Cliff Arquette (1905 – 1974) American actor & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Is there a weight limit for bags on airline flights in this country?

Charlie Weaver: If she can fit under the seat, she can fly.

Cliff Arquette (1905 – 1974) American actor & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say “I love you?”

Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

(1911 – 1993) American actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Paul, true or false… studies show that women in their sixties have a more intense craving for physical romance than when they were in their forties…

Paul Lynde: Well, that's tough!

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Paul, do most people sleep better in their street clothes than in their pajamas?

Paul Lynde: Yeah, we call them winos.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: Glen Campbell recently stated, “Love to me is something you…” Something you what?

Paul Lynde: Purchase.

(1926 – 1982) American comedian & actor
Hollywood Squares