Subject: Insults (Page 17)

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Characteristics Insults Opinion

It is disappointing to report that George Bernard Shaw appearing as George Bernard Shaw is sadly miscast in the part; satirists should be heard and not seen.

(1896 – 1955) American playwright
Acting Entertainment Insults

A retail mind in a wholesale business.

(1863 – 1945) British politician & statesman
Insults Intelligence

Having your taste criticized by Dorothy Kilgallen is like having your clothes criticized by Emmett Kelly.

(1936 – ) television talk show host
Insults

She looks like she combs her hair with an eggbeater.

(1881 – 1972) American gossip columnist
Appearance Insults

Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must’ve been something before electricity.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Age Insults Old TV/Movie Quotes

It must have been tough on your mother, not having any children.

(1911 – 1995) American actress, dancer & singer
Insults TV/Movie Quotes

The finest woman that ever walked the streets.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Insults TV/Movie Quotes

Donald, I’m not sure if you're even aware of this, but the only difference between you and Michael Douglas from the movie, Wall Street, is that no one's going to be sad when you get cancer.

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Insults People

The only man, woman, or child who ever wrote a simple declarative sentence with seven grammatical errors is dead.

(1894 – 1962) American poet, painter, essayist, author & playwright
Communication Insults Language Reading/Writing

I am going to hell and I'm looking forward to it… I'll finally get to meet Madonna.

(1965 – ) American comedian
Death Insults Places

She speaks five languages and can't act in any of them.

(1904 – 2000) English actor, director & producer
Acting Entertainment Insults

His tattoos are like shit that you wrote on the cover of your notebook.

(1968 – ) American stand-up comedian
Insults Things

Harpo, she's a lovely person – she deserves a good husband; marry her before she finds one.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Insults Marriage People

She reminds me of Paul Revere's ride – a little light in the belfry.

cartoon character (Mel Blanc)
Insults Intelligence TV/Movie Quotes

His ears made him look like a taxicab with both doors open.

(1905 – 1976) industrialist, aviator, engineer, film producer & philanthropist
Appearance Insults

If I were a grave-digger, or even a hangman, there are some people I could work for with a great deal of enjoyment.

(1803 – 1857) English writer
Death Insults Occupations People Work

I would not want Jimmy Carter and his men in charge of snake control in Ireland.

(1916 – 2005) American politician & poet
Beliefs Insults Opinion

A hyena in syrup.

(1933 – ) Russian poet, novelist, screenwriter, actor, editor & film director
Insults

Madam, you have between your legs an instrument capable of giving pleasure to thousands – and all you can do is scratch it.

(1879 – 1961) English conductor
Entertainment Insults Music

There but for the grace of God, goes God.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Insults