Subject: Insults (Page 26)

We’ve been through so much together, and most of it was your fault.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Insults Life Past

He would stab his best friend for the sake of writing an epigram on his tombstone.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Insults Reading/Writing

Oscar Wilde: Do you mind if I smoke?

Bernhardt: I don't care if you burn.

(1844-1923) French stage actress
Insults

Oscar Wilde's talent seems to me to be essentially rootless, something growing in glass on a little water.

(1852 – 1933) Irish writer, poet, art critic & dramatist
Insults

He is a shifty-eyed goddamn liar…. he's one of the few in the history of this country to run for high office talking out of both sides of his mouth at the same time and lying out of both sides.

(1884 – 1972) 33rd U.S. president
Characteristics Honesty Insults Lies

He hasn’t an enemy in the world – but all his friends hate him.

(1892 – 1964) singer, dancer, comedian, actor & songwriter
Friends Insults People Shopping

Dramatic art in her opinion is knowing how to fill a sweater.

(1908 – 1989) American actress of film, television & theater
Appearance Insults

I have more talent in my smallest fart than you have in your entire body.

(1920 – 2000) American actor
Insults

I have just read your dispatch about sore-tongued and fatigued horses; will you pardon me for asking what the horses of your army have done since the battle of Antietam that fatigues anything?

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president
Insults

A lewd vegetarian.

(1819 – 1875) English priest, university professor, historian & novelist
Insults

She's been married so many times she has rice marks on her face.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Appearance Insults Marriage

I'm not saying the wife's ugly, but last Christmas she stood under the mistletoe waiting for someone to kiss and she was still there at lent.

(1931 – 1993) English comedian
Appearance Insults

I am reading Henry James… and feel myself as one entombed in a block of smooth amber.

(1882 – 1941) English novelist, essayist, publisher & feminist
Books Insults

He doesn't die his hair, he bleaches his face.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Appearance Insults

Do you suppose I could buy back my introduction to you?

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Insults TV/Movie Quotes

When he does smile, he looks as if he's just evicted a widow.

(1932 – 1997) newspaper columnist
Insults

Esther, warn me before you come in so I have a chance to cover all of the mirrors!.

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
Appearance Insults

What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement?

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Insults Intelligence

They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge.

(1839 – 1902) Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives
Insults Intelligence

Dear Randolph, utterly unspoilt by failure.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Failure Insults

Honey, beside me, you look like Tony Randall!

(1933 – 1967) American actress, entertainer & Hollywood sex symbol
Appearance Body Insults