Subject: Insults (Page 5)

His features resembled a fossilized wash rag.

(1925 – 2008) British journalist
Appearance Insults

His [Ted Cruz’s] face looks like the entire movie Dick Tracy pushed together.

(1982 – ) American comedian, actor, writer & producer
Insults

… an old man who dresses like a Hooter’s waitress.

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality
Appearance Clothing Hair Insults

I like Wagner's music better than any other music; it is so loud that one can talk the whole time without people hearing what one says.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Insults Music

Of course, America had often been discovered before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
America Insults Places

President Clinton apparently gets so much action that every couple of weeks they have to spray WD-40 on his zipper.

(1947 – ) comedian & television host
Insults Sex

A four-hundred-dollar suit on him would look like socks on a rooster.

(1895 – 1960) American politician
Appearance Clothing Insults

The baby is fine; the only problem is that he looks like Edward G. Robinson.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Appearance Insults Relationships Ugly

He is so stupid you can't trust him with an idea.

(1902 – 1968) novelist
Insults Intelligence

I worship the quicksand he walks in.

(1925 – 2007) humorist & columnist
Beliefs Insults Language Opinion

He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.

(1944 – 2007) newspaper columnist, political commentator, humorist & author
Characteristics Insults

Useless as a pulled tooth.

(1876 – 1958) writer
Insults

Hubert Humphrey talks so fast that listening to him is like trying to read Playboy magazine with your wife turning the pages.

(1909 – 1998) U.S. senator (Arizona)
Communication Insults Speech

The Russians love Brooke Shields because her eyebrows remind them of Leonid Brezhnev.

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor
Appearance Insults

He has a profound contempt for human nature; of course, he is much given to introspection.

(1754 – 1838) French prime minister & diplomat
Insults

He has all the characteristics of a dog except loyalty.

(1793 – 1863) American politician, statesman & soldier
Animals Characteristics Dogs Insults

Nigel Mansell is the only man who goes to Nick Faldo for charisma lessons.

English actor & television personality
Auto racing Insults Sports

His ignorance is encyclopedic.

(1915 – 2002) Israeli diplomat & politician
Insults Intelligence

You had to stand in line to hate him.

(1885 – 1966) American actress & gossip columnist
Insults

As an intellectual, he bestowed upon the games of golf and bridge all the enthusiasm and perseverance that he withheld from his books and ideas.

(1920 – 1982) foreign bureau chief, editor & speechwriter
Characteristics Golf Insults Intelligence

She's a vacuum with nipples.

(1905 – 1986) Austro–Hungarian-American theater & film director
Insults Intelligence