Subject: Insults (Page 7)

Lloyd Webbers music is everywhere… but so is AIDS.

(1931 – 2003) Australian composer
Entertainment Insults Music

A man who can lighten a room by leaving it.

Insults

Robins: I've just written my 87th book.
Barbara Cartland: I've written 145.
Robins: Oh I see, one a year.

(1897 – 1985) British novelist
Age Insults Old

Dramatic art in her opinion is knowing how to fill a sweater.

(1908 – 1989) American actress of film, television & theater
Appearance Insults

His ignorance covers the world like a blanket, and there’s scarcely a hole in it anywhere.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Insults Intelligence Stupidity

He was either a man of about a hundred and fifty who was rather young for his years, or a man of about a hundred and ten who had been aged by trouble.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Age Insults

I don’t want to be patronizing… that means “talking down.”


Insults

Joe Frazier is so ugly he should donate his face to the US Bureau of Wildlife.

(1942 – ) American boxing champion
Appearance Insults

John Hurt looks like Joan of Arc, after she's burnt at stake.

Appearance Insults

Joan always cries a lot; her tear ducts must be close to her bladder.

(1908 – 1989) American actress of film, television & theater
Insults

He's the only man able to walk under a bed without hitting his head.

(1897 – 1972) broadcast journalist & gossip columnist
Appearance Insults

Writer, William Faulkner about Ernest Hemingway: He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.

Hemingway: Poor Faulkner, Does he really think big emotions come from big words?

(1899 – 1961) author & journalist
Communication Insults Reading/Writing

He is the kind of man who would cut down a redwood tree and then mount the stump to make a speech for conservation.

(1900 – 1965) diplomat & Democratic politician
Characteristics Insults

Nobody thought Mel Gibson could play a Scot but look at him now! – alcoholic and a racist!

(1972 – ) Scottish comedian
Insults People

Why don’t you come over tonight? … our dog’s in heat.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Insults

His ears made him look like a taxicab with both doors open.

(1905 – 1976) industrialist, aviator, engineer, film producer & philanthropist
Appearance Insults

The only reason he had a child is so that he can meet babysitters.

(1947 – ) comedian & television host
Insults People

Monica Lewinsky has agreed to host a new Fox reality show called Mr. Personality; Lewinsky says this way, when people ask her the most degrading thing she's ever done, she'll have a new answer.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
Insults People

He had the sort of face that makes you realize God does have a sense of humor.

American author
Appearance Insults

I could dance with you until the cows come home… on second thought I'd rather dance with the cows until you come home.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Insults TV/Movie Quotes

She [Roseanne] actually had ‘Property of Tom Arnold’ tattooed on her hip, which made me the fourth largest property owner in California.

(1959 – ) American actor & comedian
Insults