Subject: Intelligence » Memory

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Death Intelligence Memory

I can’t think of anything worse after a night of drinking than waking up next to someone and not being able to remember their name, or how you met, or why they’re dead.

(1969 – ) American actress, comedian, producer & writer
Alcohol Intelligence Memory Situations

I saw a commercial on late night TV, it said,“Forget everything you know about slipcovers,” so I did, and it was a load off my mind; then the commercial tried to sell me slipcovers, and I didn’t know what the hell they were.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Entertainment Memory Television

I constantly walk into a room and I don’t remember why.; but for some reason, I think there’s going to be a clue in the fridge.

(1964 – ) Canadian stand-up comedian, actress & television host
Intelligence Memory

Many a man fails as an original thinker simply because his memory is too good.

Intelligence Memory Wisdom

A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Intelligence Memory

Women and elephants never forget an injury.

Intelligence Memory Murphy’s Laws Women

A man always remembers his first love with special tenderness, but after that he begins to bunch them.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Emotions Intelligence Love Memory

An autobiography usually reveals nothing bad about its writer except his memory.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Books Communication Memory Reading/Writing

Recollect: To recall with additions something not previously known.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Memory

My fairy Godmother once asked me if I’d rather have a long penis or a long memory… I forget what my answer was.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Intelligence Memory

Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again.


Memory Murphy’s Laws People Problems Situations

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, “You're only interested in one thing,” and you can't remember what it is.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Marriage Memory Sex

The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Intelligence Memory Politicians

I'm going to memorize your name and throw my head away.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Memory

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it.

(1533 – 1592) French writer
Intelligence Memory

Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.

Intelligence Memory Past

Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything one learned in school.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Education Learning Memory School

I remember when Grandpa’s memories started to go; it was the day I caught him urinating with the door open… which is not a huge deal, but it’s annoying when I’m trying to drive.

Canadian comedian & actor
Intelligence Memory Relationships Situations

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is.

(1908 – 2002) comedian, radio & television actor
Marriage Memory Problems Sex Wives

One who has a clear conscience has a foggy memory.

Intelligence Memory