Subject: Intelligence (Page 14)

One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, there ain't nothin' can beat teamwork.

(1927 – 1989) author, essayist & environmentalist
Intelligence Relationships Stupidity

Some folks are wise and some otherwise.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Intelligence Stupidity Wisdom

When two people decide to get a divorce, it isn't a sign that they don't understand one another, but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Divorce Marriage Understanding

History would be an excellent thing, if only it were true.

(1828 – 1910) Russian writer
History Intelligence Time

You get the feeling that Dan Quayle's golf bag doesn't have a full set of irons?

(1925 – 2005) television host
Intelligence

A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Fools Intelligence People

Your head is as empty as a hermit's address book.

(1955 – ) English actor
Intelligence Stupidity

He had just about enough intelligence to open his mouth when he wanted to eat, but certainly no more.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Insults Intelligence

If you're confident after you've just finished an exam, it's because you don't know enough to know better.

Education Intelligence Murphy’s Laws School

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Beliefs Intelligence Law Opinion

Laziness is the mother of nine inventions out of ten.

Ideas Intelligence Murphy’s Laws

There is a distinct difference between having an open mind and having a hole in your head from which your brain leaks out.

(1928 – ) Canadian stage magician, skeptic & opponent of pseudoscience
Intelligence

I had to go back to New York recently for a family reunion… I walk in there, I look at everyone, and I think: 'I'm getting my tubes tied; that's it; the tree ends here.'

American stand-up comedian, television writer & actor
Intelligence Relationships

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

(1983 – ) American actor, producer, writer & director
Stupidity TV/Movie Quotes

Doctors tell me I have the body of a thirty year old. I know I have the brain of a fifteen year old. If you've got both, you can play baseball.

American baseball player
Appearance Baseball Body Intelligence Sports

A word to the wise is not sufficient if it doesn't make sense.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Communication Intelligence Wisdom

About the only thing you can say for his constipation of ideas is his diarrhea of words.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor
Communication Ideas Insults Intelligence Speech

The Irish people do not gladly suffer common sense.

(1878 – 1957) Irish poet, author, athlete & politician
Intelligence People Places

Oh, right! To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people! I’ve known sheep that could outwit you. I’ve worn dresses with higher IQs!


Stupidity TV/Movie Quotes

The only qualifications for a lineman are to be big and dumb; to be a back, you only have to be dumb.

(1888 – 1931) American football player & coach
Football Intelligence Sports Stupidity

I know this music from memory, not from the music.

(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist
Entertainment Memory Misspokements Music