Subject: Intelligence (Page 15)

They don't get the philosophy jokes in Alabama; they think Descartes is the thing you put before de-horse.

comedian
Intelligence Places

It’s difficult to remember when you haven’t played it before.

(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist
Entertainment Intelligence Memory Misspokements Music

Where ignorance is bliss, it's foolish to borrow your neighbor's newspaper.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Intelligence

Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it.

(1911 – 1980) humorist, writer, television host & journalist
Communication Intelligence Speech

Intelligent people make many mistakes because they cannot believe the world is really as foolish as it is.

(1741 – 1794) French writer
Fools Intelligence

A professor must have a theory as a dog must have fleas.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Animals Dogs Ideas Intelligence

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.

(1942 – ) American author and teacher
Intelligence Men People Women

I have always had a bad memory, as far back as I can remember.


Intelligence Memory

No man ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.

Intelligence Money Murphy’s Laws

I don't want to elect anyone stupid enough to want the job.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Elections/Voting Government Intelligence President Stupidity

He is so stupid… it takes him an hour to cook Minute Rice.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

I told one player, 'Son, I can't understand it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'

American basketball coach & executive
Basketball Intelligence

I think I am, therefore I am… I think.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Intelligence Life

A wit with dunces, and a dunce with wits.

(1688 – 1744) English poet
Insults Intelligence

In view of the fact that God limited the intelligence of man, it seems unfair that He did not also limit his stupidity.

(1876 – 1967) German statesman
Beliefs God Intelligence Stupidity

He has the lucidity which is the byproduct of a fundamentally sterile mind.

(1897 – 1960) Welsh labor leader & politician
Insults Intelligence

He only had one idea and that was wrong.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Ideas Insults Intelligence

If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Intelligence Life

He occasionally stumbled over the truth, but hastily picked himself up and hurried on as if nothing had happened.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Insults Intelligence

Germs attack people where they're weakest – which is why there are so many head colds.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Health Intelligence

1. Any great truth can – and eventually will – be expressed as a cliche.

2. Half of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.

Communication Facts Intelligence Murphy’s Laws