Subject: Intelligence (Page 18)

Whenever I meet a pretty girl, the first thing I look for is intelligence; because if she doesn’t have that, then she’s mine.

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Girls Intelligence People Women

I am in the prime of senility.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Age Memory Mind Old

Now there's a man with an open mind – you can feel the breeze from here!

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Individuals Insults Intelligence

How To Raise Your I.Q. by Eating Gifted Children

Book Titles Intelligence

I've been sitting my whole life, and a dog has never looked at me as though he thought I was tricky.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Animals Dogs Intelligence

The fellow who laughs last may laugh best, but he gets the reputation of being very slow-witted.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Emotions Fools Intelligence Laughter

If you’re too open-minded; your brains will fall out.

(1919 – ) American poet, painter & liberal activist
Intelligence Mind

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

(1940 – ) computer scientist
Future Ideas Intelligence Time

Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president
Communication Fools Intelligence Speech

He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.

(1844 – 1912) Scottish poet, novelist & literary critic
Communication Intelligence Science/Weather

A loaded wagon makes no noise.

Intelligence Wisdom

Anyone who has begun to think places some portion of the world in jeopardy.

(1859 – 1952) American philosopher, psychologist & educational reformer
Intelligence

I am not young enough to know everything.

(1860 – 1937) Scottish author, dramatist (creator of Peter Pan)
Age Education Intelligence Young

People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Fools Intelligence People

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

Intelligence

Although it is not true that all conservatives are stupid people, it is true that most stupid people are conservative.

(1806-1873) British philosopher
Beliefs Government Intelligence Opinion Stupidity

In no time, it will be a forgotten memory.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Communication Memory Misspokements Speech Time

Evil and stupidity are randomly distributed.

Murphy’s Laws Stupidity

Intelligence tests are biased toward the literate.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Intelligence Reading/Writing

Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Intelligence TV/Movie Quotes Understanding

A little learning is a dangerous thing but a lot of ignorance is just as bad.

(1947 – ) radio broadcaster & host
Intelligence Problems Stupidity