Subject: Intelligence (Page 19)

Outside of a dog, a book is your best friend, and inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Age Animals Books Communication Dogs Intelligence Reading/Writing Relationships Situations

If you only read one book in your life… I highly recommend you keep your mouth shut.

(1967 – ) English comedian
Communication Intelligence Reading/Writing

It takes hundreds of nuts to hold a car together, but it takes only one of them to scatter it all over the highway.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Autos Fools Things

Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child; just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five.

(1932 – 2009) author, poet & critic
Golf Honesty Insults Intelligence Sports

I had amnesia… once or twice.


Health Memory

Philosophy: Common sense in a dress suit.

Definitions Intelligence Wisdom

A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts.

Alcohol Ideas Murphy’s Laws

There's a fine line between genius and insanity and I have erased this line.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Intelligence

The boy's about as sharp as a bowling ball.

cartoon character (Mel Blanc)
Insults Stupidity TV/Movie Quotes

Creativity: The sudden cessation of stupidity.

Definitions Intelligence

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is.

(1908 – 2002) comedian, radio & television actor
Marriage Memory Problems Sex Wives

It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.

Emotions Memory Past

Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.

(1948 – ) English rock vocalist & songwriter
Intelligence Mind

The amount of expertise varies in inverse proportion to the number of statements understood by the general public.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People Understanding

A loaded wagon makes no noise.

Intelligence Wisdom

Those people who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.

(1920 – 1992) American science and science fiction author & professor
Intelligence People

There must be a happy medium somewhere between being totally informed and blissfully unaware.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Characteristics Intelligence

… New Jersey?

(1973 – ) American actress
Intelligence Misspokements Places

A woman's appetite is twice that of a man's; her sexual desire, four times; her intelligence, eight times.


Intelligence Men People Self Sex

The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.

Murphy’s Laws Stupidity

If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.

Intelligence Stupidity