Subject: Intelligence (Page 20)

Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Ideas Things

The measure of a bird dog's intelligence can be determined by the length of time it takes to resign yourself to his way of thinking.

Animals Dogs Intelligence Murphy’s Laws

All the unhappy marriages come from husbands having brains; what good are brains to a man? … they only unsettle him.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Husbands Intelligence Marriage Wisdom

The word “user” is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Computers Intelligence Things

 Who do you think was smarter, Jesus or Buddha? … I mean, just in terms of not letting themselves get crucified.

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Intelligence

Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with it's just compounding the felony.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Alcohol Food/Drink Fools Intelligence

Only someone who understands something absolutely can explain it so no one else can understand it.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Understanding

You get the feeling that Dan Quayle's golf bag doesn't have a full set of irons?

(1925 – 2005) television host
Intelligence

You'd think such a little mind would be lonely in such a big head.

(1852 – 1917) English actor & theater manager
Insults Intelligence

He ain’t got enough sense to poor piss out of a boot.

Expressions Intelligence Stupidity

The only genius with an IQ of 60.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Insults Intelligence

Insane people are always sure that they are fine; it is only the sane people who are willing to admit that they are crazy.

(1941 – 2012) American novelist, producer, screenwriter & director
Intelligence

I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Intelligence Mind

I had amnesia… once or twice.


Health Memory

We always admire the intelligence of those who ask us for advice.

(1927 – ) American lawyer, activist & public official
Intelligence People

Sharp as a sack full of wet mice.

cartoon character (Mel Blanc)
Insults Stupidity TV/Movie Quotes

It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.

(1817 – 1862) American author, poet, philosopher,, naturalist & historian
Appearance Intelligence Wisdom

He was born stupid, and greatly increased his birthright.

(1835 – 1902) English composer, author & satirist
Insults Intelligence

Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.

(1869 – 1944) Canadian economist & humorist
Intelligence Money

Doctors tell me I have the body of a thirty year old. I know I have the brain of a fifteen year old. If you've got both, you can play baseball.

American baseball player
Appearance Baseball Body Intelligence Sports

American proverb

Intelligence Proverbs