Subject: Intelligence (Page 21)

Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will establish a reputation as an expert.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
Intelligence

I had to go back to New York recently for a family reunion… I walk in there, I look at everyone, and I think: 'I'm getting my tubes tied; that's it; the tree ends here.'

American stand-up comedian, television writer & actor
Intelligence Relationships

He couldn’t find his ass with a flashlight and a roadmap.

Expressions Intelligence Stupidity

Common sense is compelled to make its way without the enthusiasm of anyone.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Intelligence

I made a 1,600 minus 800 minus 200 on the SAT, so I'm very intelligent when I speak.

American basketball player
Education Intelligence Misspokements School

Yeah, she's beautiful, but you can't find her IQ with a flashlight.

Appearance Body Insults Intelligence

Gross ignorance is 144 times worse than ordinary ignorance.

(1898 – 1971) American humorist
Intelligence Stupidity

I tell you boy, the wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.

(1962 – ) American ventriloquist & stand-up comedian
Intelligence Stupidity

One has fear in front of a goat, in back of a mule, and on every side of a fool.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Emotions Fear Fools Intelligence

Any simple idea will be worded in the most complicated way.

Communication Ideas Intelligence Language Murphy’s Laws

This weekend President Bush gave a speech honoring Abraham Lincoln’s birthday.  There was an awkward moment when Bush referred to Lincoln as “the guy who invented the penny.”

(1963 – ) television host & comedian
Intelligence People

The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook.

(1842 – 1910) American philosopher & psychologist
Intelligence Wisdom

Go back to what our founders and our founding documents meant – they’re quite clear –- that we would create law based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Beliefs God Government Misspokements Stupidity

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
America Intelligence Language Military Places

Couldn’t find his rear with his hands in his back pockets

Expressions Fools Intelligence Stupidity

He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

Emotions Intelligence Laughter Thinking

In mathematics you don't understand things… you just get used to them.

(1903 – 1957) Hungarian-American mathematician
Intelligence Science/Weather Understanding

I don't want to elect anyone stupid enough to want the job.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Elections/Voting Government Intelligence President Stupidity

The chance of forgetting something is directly proportional to… to…

Intelligence Memory Murphy’s Laws

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Government Intelligence Politicians

A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.


Intelligence Thinking