Subject: Intelligence (Page 22)

Books are for people who don't have ideas of their own.

(1984 – ) American stand-up comedian
Books Communication Ideas Intelligence

There must be a happy medium somewhere between being totally informed and blissfully unaware.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Characteristics Intelligence

My daddy always said that a man who walks around with a smile on his face all the time can’t possibly know what's going on.

U.S. Senator (1942 – 2015) U.S. senator (Tennessee) & actor
Emotions Intelligence

Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Health Intelligence Situations Sleep Wealth

Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Intelligence Problems Understanding

You may have genius; the contrary is, of course, probable.

(1809 – 1894) physician, professor, lecturer & author
Insults Intelligence

Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
America Government Intelligence Occupations Places Work

The way I see it… If you need both of your hands for whatever it is you’re doing, then your brain should probably be in on it too.

(1958 – ) comedian, actress & television host
Autos Driving Intelligence Things

A movie is never any better than the stupidest man connected with it.

(1894 – 1964) American screenwriter, director, producer, playwright & novelist
Entertainment Film Intelligence Stupidity

A committee can make a decision that is dumber than any of its members.


Intelligence People

More people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Beliefs Intelligence Religion

Right now I’m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time — I think I’ve forgotten this before.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Health Memory Situations

Philosophy is to the real world as masturbation is to sex.

(1818 – 1883) German philosopher, economist, sociologist & socialist
Education Intelligence Sex

No one would remember the Good Samaritan if he'd only had good intentions – he had money, too.

(1925 – 2013) British prime minister & politician
Memory Money

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it.

(1533 – 1592) French writer
Intelligence Memory

It's a scientific fact; for every year a person lives in Hollywood, they lose two points of their IQ.

(1924 – 1984) American author
Hollywood Intelligence Places

My girlfriend said she wanted me to dominate her; so I said, “OK, let’s play Scrabble.”

(1978 – ) American stand-up comedian
Intelligence Sex

Feminism was established so as to allow unattractive women easier access to the mainstream of society.

(1951 – ) American conservative radio talk-show host
Beliefs Stupidity

My experience is that people are most likely to listen to reason when in bed.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Intelligence Situations Understanding

Success in almost any field depends more on energy and drive than it does on intelligence; this explains why we have so many stupid leaders.

(1920 – 2003) American writer
Intelligence Success

Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, “You're only interested in one thing,” and you can't remember what it is.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Marriage Memory Sex