Subject: Intelligence (Page 28)

How is it that little children are so intelligent and men are so stupid? … it must be education that does it.

(1824 – 1895) French writer
Education Intelligence

Fanaticism consists in redoubling your effort when you have forgotten your aim.

(1863 – 1952) Spanish American philosopher, essayist, poet & novelist
Characteristics Intelligence

Who’s cruel idea was it to put an “s” in the word “lisp”?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Ideas Intelligence Language

They don't get the philosophy jokes in Alabama; they think Descartes is the thing you put before de-horse.

comedian
Intelligence Places

Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student; at least they can find Kuwait.

(1952 – ) American writer & comedian
Education Intelligence Learning

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Characteristics Intelligence Stupidity

She is so stupid… she took a blood test and failed.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

He who devotes sixteen hours a day to hard study may become at sixty as wise as he thought himself at twenty.

(1880 – ?) American author
Education Intelligence Learning Wisdom

Nowadays a parlor maid as ignorant as Queen Victoria was when she came to the throne would be classed as mentally defective.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Insults Intelligence

Nature gave man two ends – one to sit on and one to think with; ever since then man’s success or failure has been dependent on the one he used most.

(1867 – 1937) American anti-militarist writer & political activist
Intelligence People

You know how your friends are all morons, and they got the stories wrong all the time?… it’s the same here with the Bible.

(1960 – ) American stand-up comedian & writer
Friends Intelligence Old People

The problem with Ireland is that it's a country full of genius, but with absolutely no talent.

(1926 – 2009) Irish dramatist, television writer & essayist
Insults Intelligence

Heat produced by pressure expands to fill the mind available, from which it can pass only to a cooler mind.

Emotions Intelligence Murphy’s Laws

I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered together at the White House – with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone.

(1917 – 1963) 35th U.S. president
Intelligence President

No good decision was ever made in a swivel chair.

(1885 – 1945) U.S. Army general
Intelligence

Any simple idea will be worded in the most complicated way.

Communication Ideas Intelligence Language Murphy’s Laws

It is sometimes an appropriate response to reality to go insane.

(1928 – 1982) American novelist, short story writer & essayist
Beliefs Intelligence Mind

The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that carries any reward.

(1883 – 1946) English economist
Government Intelligence Money Taxes

I come from a stupid family… during the Civil War my great uncle fought for the west!

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Family Intelligence Relationships Stupidity

Too often, people who want to offer sound advice give more sound than advice!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Communication Intelligence Speech

Men and nations will act rationally towards each other only after all other possibilities have been exhausted.

Characteristics Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People