Subject: Intelligence (Page 34)

Learned Fool: One who has read everything, and simply remembered it.

Definitions Intelligence

My wife’s not smart, you know? She used to reach inside her bra to count to two.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Intelligence

People with narrow minds usually have broad tongues.

Communication Fools Intelligence Proverbs Speech

The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Fools Intelligence

I'd rather be rich than stupid.

Intelligence Money Stupidity Wealth

A word to the wise is not sufficient if it doesn't make sense.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Communication Intelligence Wisdom

If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Intelligence People

People say it’s easy to make fun of retarded people, but it’s not… you really have to explain it to them.

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Intelligence People

An intellectual is a person who has discovered something more interesting than sex.

(1894 – 1963) English writer
Intelligence Sex

Go back to what our founders and our founding documents meant – they’re quite clear –- that we would create law based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Beliefs God Government Misspokements Stupidity

A decision is what a man makes when he can’t get anyone to serve on a committee.

(1911 – 1993) columnist & novelist
Intelligence

The problem with Ireland is that it's a country full of genius, but with absolutely no talent.

(1926 – 2009) Irish dramatist, television writer & essayist
Insults Intelligence

You know everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Intelligence

Only a man who has loved a woman of genius can appreciate what happiness there is in loving a fool.

(1754 – 1838) French prime minister & diplomat
Fools Intelligence Marriage Men Women

If you understand it, it's obsolete.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Understanding

He is so stupid… he got fired from an M&M factory for throwing out all the W's.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

Smart as a tree full of owls.

Animals Expressions Intelligence Wisdom

Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Education Fools Intelligence Wisdom

He is so stupid… mind readers charge him half price.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

There are four things that hold back human progress – ignorance, stupidity, committees and accountants.

(1797 – 1875) American accountant
Intelligence Situations Stupidity

The way I see it… If you need both of your hands for whatever it is you’re doing, then your brain should probably be in on it too.

(1958 – ) comedian, actress & television host
Autos Driving Intelligence Things