Subject: Intelligence (Page 41)

Some folks are wise and some are otherwise.

(1721 – 1771) Scottish poet & author
Insults Intelligence People

It's what a fellow thinks he knows that hurts him.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Intelligence

It doesn't take rocket appliances.

Intelligence Malaprops

At twenty, we don’t care what the world thinks of us; at thirty, we worry about what it’s thinking of us; at forty, we discover it isn’t thinking about us at all.

Age Intelligence

Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will establish yourself as an expert.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Situations

Put it out of your mind; in no time, it will be a forgotten memory.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Intelligence Memory Misspokements

He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.

(1844 – 1912) Scottish poet, novelist & literary critic
Communication Intelligence Science/Weather

Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Communication Intelligence Life Places Science/Weather

A coach isn't as smart as people say he is when he's wins, or as stupid as when he loses.

(1924 – 2012) American football player & coach
Football Intelligence Sports

I don't want to elect anyone stupid enough to want the job.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Elections/Voting Government Intelligence President Stupidity

No one has ever had an idea in a dress suit.

(1891 – 1941) Canadian physician & physiologist
Appearance Clothing Ideas Intelligence

She reminds me of Paul Revere's ride – a little light in the belfry.

cartoon character (Mel Blanc)
Insults Intelligence TV/Movie Quotes

If brains were all that important in a beauty contest, you could enter wearing a Hefty Bag.

(1946 – 1994) writer & humorist
Appearance Body Intelligence

A good storyteller is a person with a good memory and hopes other people haven't.

(1876 – 1944) American author, humorist & columnist
Communication Memory Speech

You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think.

(1908 – 2002) comedian, radio & television actor
Congress Government Intelligence Wisdom

Anyone taken as an individual is tolerably sensible and reasonable – as a member of a crowd, he at once becomes a blockhead.

Fools Individuals Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People

Nowadays a parlor maid as ignorant as Queen Victoria was when she came to the throne would be classed as mentally defective.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Insults Intelligence

To all you hunters who kill animals for food, shame on you; you ought to go to the store and buy the meat that was made there, where no animals were harmed.

Classifieds Misspokements Stupidity

Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.

(1945 – 2010) American comedian & actor
Characteristics Honesty Intelligence

The distance between many people’s ears is a block.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Intelligence

The word “user” is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Computers Intelligence Things