Subject: Intelligence (Page 46)

The only genius with an IQ of 60.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Insults Intelligence

Sometimes a majority simply means that all the fools are on the same side.

(1925 – ) writer
Fools Intelligence People

I have a simple philosophy; fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches.

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president
Intelligence

Nowadays a parlor maid as ignorant as Queen Victoria was when she came to the throne would be classed as mentally defective.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Insults Intelligence

Little things affect little minds.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Fools Intelligence

Anyone taken as an individual is tolerably sensible and reasonable – as a member of a crowd, he at once becomes a blockhead.

Fools Individuals Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People

It’s easy to smile when you have a squirrel’s intellect.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
Intelligence Stupidity

If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Characteristics Facts Intelligence Situations Truth

If your head is wax, don't walk in the sun.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Intelligence Situations

It is all very well to be able to write books, but can you waggle your ears?

(1860 – 1937) Scottish author, dramatist (creator of Peter Pan)
Communication Intelligence Reading/Writing

It is safe to wager that every public idea and every accepted convention is sheer foolishness, because it has suited the majority.

(1741 – 1794) French writer
Intelligence Stupidity

I told her the thing I loved most about her was her mind… because that's what told her to get into bed with me naked.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Intelligence Mind Sex

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Doctors Fools Intelligence

A fool and his money is a friend indeed.

Fools Friends Intelligence Money People

She was short on intellect, but long on shape.

(1672 – 1719) English essasyist, poet & politician
Appearance Body Intelligence

She was short on intellect, but long on shape.

(1866 – 1944) American writer, newspaper columnist, playwright & humorist
Appearance Insults Intelligence

The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number seventy-nine.

(1952 – 2001) English writer, dramatist, & musician
Intelligence New York City Places

I don’t know why my brain has kept all the words to the Gilligan’s Island theme song and has deleted everything about triangles.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Intelligence Mind Science/Weather

Men and nations will act rationally towards each other only after all other possibilities have been exhausted.

Characteristics Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People

No man will ever put his hand up your dress looking for a library card.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Intelligence Men People Sex

If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.

(1844 – 1924) French novelist
Communication Intelligence Speech