Subject: Life (Page 15)

The good things in life are free, except for health care, and electricity.

American comedian & actor

Life doesn’t imitate art, it imitates bad television.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

It’s not true that life is one damn thing after another; it is the same damn thing over and over.

(1892 – 1950) poet

Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist

Some mornings, it’s just not worth chewing through the leather straps.

(1956 – ) American comedian

Please don’t ask me what the score is, I’m not even sure what the game is.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist

I can take reality in small doses, but not as a life style.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer

If you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much room.

Maybe it’s true that life begins at fifty… but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress

Make Life Your Bitch

It’s hard to be famous and alive.

(1948 – ) English novelist

My grandfather always said that living is like licking honey off a thorn.

(1898 – 1951) Slovene-American author & translator

People with money live so damn long.

There ought to be a better way of starting the day than having to get up.

(1907 – 1987) journalist & columnist

The four stages of a man are infancy, childhood, adolescence and obsolescence.

(1912 – 2010) Canadian-born American radio & television personality & humorist

I quit smoking ’cause I want to live, and now that I’m not smoking, I don’t want to live anymore.

comedian

The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive.

(1907 – 1988) science fiction author

It is after you have lost your teeth that you can afford to buy steaks.

(1841–1919) French artist

Never do anything you wouldn’t get caught dead doing.

Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian

You will never have more energy or enthusiasm, hair, or brain cells than you have today.

(1937 – 2014) American co-host of radio show “Car Talk”