Subject: Life (Page 8)

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing… if you can fake that, you’ve got it made.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host

When opportunity knocks, you’ve got headphones on.

Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist

Some of the most well-trodden roads lead nowhere.

My grandfather always said that living is like licking honey off a thorn.

(1898 – 1951) Slovene-American author & translator

For me, the cinema is not a slice of life, but a piece of cake.

(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer

I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

I’m living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.

(1894 – 1962) American poet, painter, essayist, author & playwright

Life is like an onion: You peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep.

Carl Sandburg (1878 – 1967) biographer & poet

I try to live by the adage: “You scratch my back; I’ll let you know when to stop.”

(1904 – 1973) English novelist & biographer

If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there.

(1937 – 2014) American co-host of radio show “Car Talk”

If I had my life to live over, I wouldn't have time.

(1936 – 1992) singer, songwriter, musician & actor

Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot.

(1889 – 1977) English comedian, actor & film director

We must all hang together, or most assuredly we shall all hang separately.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor

The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the devil’s own satanic herd!

(1955 – ) English actor

Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist

Death: Life’s way of telling you you’ve been fired.

I do benefits for all religions – I’d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor

The good Lord never gives you more than you can handle… unless you die of something.

(1935 – ) American cartoonist

I can take reality in small doses, but not as a life style.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer

There are two great rules of life: 1. Never tell everything at once.

(1931 – ) American golfer & broadcaster