Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Malaprops
(Page 20)
Your honor, may I
encroach
the bench?
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Law
Malaprops
Approach the bench
Court
It’s all
moth-eared.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Dog-eared
This makes me so sore it gets my
dandruff
up.
Samuel Goldwyn
(1879 – 1974) film producer
Anger
Malaprops
Dander
From the prairies, to the oceans,
wide
with foam.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
America
Malaprops
Places
White with foam
Maybe I oughta get one of them priests in to
exercise
with her.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
TV/Movie Quotes
Exorcise
Those people all
corregated
over there.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Congregated
This is a Jewish cake – they give this to a Jewish kid before he gets
circumscribed.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Circumsized
Just 'cause there's
snow in the basement don't mean there ain't no fire in the roof!
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Just because there’s snow on the roof doesn’t mean there’s not a fire in the furnace
It’s in an upward
spinal.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
TV/Movie Quotes
Spiral
Ten bucks puts a whole different
complexity
on the situation.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Complexion
Passed with flying
carpets.
Malaprop
Malaprops
Colors
You got a very
warfed
sense of humor.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
TV/Movie Quotes
Warped
This was a very classy guy – in a sharp coat there, one of them velvet collars, and of of them pearl-gray
hamburgers
on his head.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Homburg hat
All girls go cockeyed during
pooberescency.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Puberty
George Meaney, head of the
UFO-CIA.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
AFL-CIO
Unions
As youse people say,
Sh-boom.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
People
Jews
Shalom
Probably a torn
filament
right there in the kneecap.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Health
Malaprops
Ligament
Don't be accusing me of taking a bribe. You know what they call that,
definition
of character.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Defamation of character
Rip Van
Heussen
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Rip Van Winkle
To avoid misunderstanding, I’ll stop speaking formal English and just use the
binocular.
Anonymous
Communication
Language
Malaprops
Vernacular
Wouldn’t let ’em get in a word
wedgewise.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
TV/Movie Quotes
Edgewise
Page 20 of 35
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