Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Malaprops
(Page 27)
A lot of people are leaving the company; the
nutrition
rate is very high.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Attrition
Don’t worry about the war; it’s all over but the
shooting.
Samuel Goldwyn
(1879 – 1974) film producer
Malaprops
War
Shouting
In her elastic stockings, next to her
very close
veins.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Health
Malaprops
Varicose
I'm an
Aquarium.
Christina Applegate
(1971 – ) American actress
Malaprops
TV/Movie Quotes
Aquarius
As Kelly Bundy in “Married With Children”
We're like two peas in a
pot.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Situations
Two peas in a pod
And then he [Mike Tyson] will have only
channel
vision.
Frank Bruno
English boxer
Malaprops
Tunnel vision
She takes everything I say out of
contest.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Communication
Malaprops
Context
Ain’t ya never heard
silence is gold?
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Situations
Quiet
Silence is golden
Maybe I’d like to run around the house my drawers, and with her here, I felt
inhabited.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
TV/Movie Quotes
Inhibited
Why don't you go take a
short walk on a long pier?
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Long walk off a short pier
… buy one of them battery operated
transvestite
radios.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Transistor
Didn’t he take the
exercise
tax off cars?
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Excise tax
a
menstrual
show
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Minstrel
I think I've got the mucus of a good team.
Dick Duckworth
Colemanballs
Malaprops
Nucleus
That ain’t no
trampoloon.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Trampoline
You don’t hear me gettin’
historical.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops
Hysterical
She has extra-
century
perception.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Extrasensory perception (ESP)
Intuition
She
plummeted
the deaths of inequity.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Plumbed the depths
Get the
hanging dog
expression off your face.
Archie Bunker
television character,
All In the Family
(Carroll O’Connor)
Appearance
Malaprops
Hang dog
What’s all this fuss I’ve been hearing about the presidential
erection?
Gilda Radner
(1946 – 1989) comedian & actress
Malaprops
TV/Movie Quotes
As Emily Litella on “Saturday Night Live”
I'm going to the store to buy a soup
latrine.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Taurine
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