Subject: Marriage (Page 12)

My wife was too beautiful for words… but not for arguments.

(1882 – 1942) American actor
Marriage Wives

Men enter politics solely as a result of being unhappily married.

(1909 – 1993) British naval historian & author
Government Marriage Politics

I’ve never won an argument with her; and the only times I thought I had, I found out the argument wasn’t over yet.

(1924 – ) 39th U.S. president & humanitarian
Wives

My wife made me a millionaire. Before she divorced me, I had three million.

professional hockey player
Divorce Hockey Marriage Misspokements Sports

Take my wife… please!

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Marriage Wives Wordplay

Don’t forget Mother’s Day; or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad’s Third Wife Day.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Divorce Family Marriage Mothers

Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do… but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did.

Husbands Marriage Wives

Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.

(1913 – 1989) American radio, television, film & voice actor
Marriage Success Wives

Alimony: The high cost of leaving.

Definitions Marriage

There's only one thing wrong with wife swapping… you get another wife.

writer, website creator
Marriage Sex Wives

Women should put a picture of their missing husbands on beer cans.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Husbands Marriage

Marriage is a triumph of habit over hate.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Emotions Marriage

Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love, though I'd stepped in it a few times.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Emotions Husbands Love Marriage

I used to have a speech impediment, but we got divorced.

(1926 – 1988) American cartoonist (The Lockhorns)
Communication Divorce Marriage Speech Wives

I think – therefore I'm single.

(1961 – ) comedian, writer, radio & television personality & blogger
Intelligence Marriage

It's better to have loved and lost, then have to live with that bitch for the rest of my life.

comedian
Divorce Emotions Love Marriage

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.

Marriage Men Murphy’s Laws People Wives

She's been married so many times she has rice marks on her face.

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Appearance Insults Marriage

Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Conflict Marriage War

Hard work is damn near as overrated as monogamy.

(1893 – 1935) U.S. governor & senator (Louisiana)
Marriage Work

In many instances, marriage vows would be more accurate if the phrase were changed to ‘Until debt do us part.’

(1920 – 2001) American writer & humorist
Marriage Money