Subject: Marriage (Page 20)

My wife converted me to religion; I never believed in hell until I married her.

(1892 – 1992) American film & television producer & director
Beliefs Marriage Religion Wives

Ah Mozart! He was happily married… but his wife wasn’t.

(1909 – 2000) Danish-born comedian & pianist
Marriage

If you want to read about love and marriage, you've got to buy two separate books.

(1927 – 2004) American comedian & actor
Books Communication Emotions Love Marriage Reading/Writing

You can make a lot of money in this game; just ask my ex-wives; both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Golf Money Sports Wives

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage – they' ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Marriage Men

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Food/Drink Hollywood Marriage Time

My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix’ that's why he's never worked.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Husbands Marriage Work

The most dangerous food is wedding cake.

Marriage Proverbs

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend; a successful woman is one who can find such a man.

(1921 – 1995) American actress
Husbands Marriage Wives

One of my favorite oxymorons is engagement party.

writer, website creator
Marriage Sex

We were happily married for eight months… unfortunately, we were married for four and a half years.


Marriage

Polygamy: An endeavour to get more out of life than there is in it.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher
Life Marriage Wives

When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me… no one showed up.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Divorce Family Marriage Parents

Always get married early in the morning; that way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day.

(1920 – 2014) American actor & entertainer
Divorce Marriage

A fate worse than marriage; a sort of eternal engagement.

(1939 – ) English playwright
Marriage

You know… there is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time… husband!

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Husbands Marriage

Whenever she uses the phrase 'I was thinking…,' that means I either have to move, paint or buy something.

American actor & comedian
Marriage Situations Wives

I'd marry again if I found a man who had 15 million and would sign over half of it to me before the marriage and guarantee he'd be dead within a year.

(1908 – 1989) American actress of film, television & theater
Marriage Money

Love is blind… but marriage is the real eye-opener.

Emotions Love Marriage

Whenever I get married, I start buying Gourmet magazine.

(1941 – 2012) American novelist, producer, screenwriter & director
Communication Marriage Reading/Writing

My parents divorced when I was one year old so I don't really remember any of the details, but luckily my mom does so she's been really helpful.

(1978 – ) American stand-up comedian, actress & writer
Divorce Family Marriage Parents