Subject: Marriage (Page 22)

Monogamy leaves a lot to be desired.

Marriage

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Marriage

His finest hour lasted a minute and a half.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Communication Husbands Marriage

Real happiness is when you marry a girl for love and find out later she has money.

(1928 – 2003) English entertainer
Emotions Happiness Love Marriage Money Wealth

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband, while a man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

Future Husbands Marriage Proverbs Time Wives

Honeymoon: A short period of doting between dating and debting.

Definitions Marriage

A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.

(1911 – 1999) comedian, author & columnist
Health Wives

The husband who doesn't tell his wife everything probably reasons that what she doesn't know won't hurt him.


Communication Husbands Marriage Wives

Judge not a man by his clothes, but by his wife's clothes.

(1864 – 1930) Scottish whisky distiller
Appearance Clothing Men People Wives

Don’t over-analyze your marriage; it’s like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Marriage

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Animals Death Dogs Marriage

Middle-age is the time of life, that a man first notices – in his wife.

(1906 – 1989) American poet & author
Age Marriage Wives

Whatever arrangement you make for the division of household duties, your husband's job will be easier.

Housework Husbands Murphy’s Laws Wives

Being an old maid is like death by drowning, a really delightful sensation after you cease to struggle.

(1885 – 1968) American writer
Marriage People Women

It is better to have an ugly wife for one’s self than a beautiful wife for others.

Appearance Marriage Proverbs Wives

No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying.

Communication Marriage Speech Wives

My wife made me join a bridge club… I jump off next Tuesday.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Marriage Situations Wives

I think the secret to a successful marriage is low expectations.

(1959 – ) American stand-up comedian
Marriage

Divorce: A splitting headache.

Definitions Divorce Marriage

Sex again Peg? … we’ve been married seventeen years now; can’t we just be friends?

(1946 – ) American actor
Marriage Sex TV/Movie Quotes

Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands… but English women only hope to find in their butlers.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
America Characteristics England Husbands Women